In Acche Din I Am Afraid For My Life

In Acche Din I Am Afraid For My Life 

I’m afraid for my life.
I’m afraid that my face, my eyes, my mouth, my hair,
My arms, my torso, my breasts, my legs;
My vessel of existence,
Is a vessel of my negation.

I’m afraid for my life.
My eyes, a little slanted and not almond round like of those here.
My face, with the slightly higher cheekbones and defined jaw;
My body, short and stout like my brethren of the hills.
My vessel of existence,
Is a vessel of my negation.

My soul, my mind, my heart, only valued so much so for their feminity.
Not so much for their masculinity.
I am warm and soft.
I am cold and hard.
I am prized or raped.
I am hated or raped.

I am afraid for my life:
My vessel of existence,
Is the vessel of my negation.
All that I do, all that I say,
Watched, studied and controlled,
By my self and by others
A constant eye, a constant tether,
Watching, tugging,
Saving and hurting,
I am not my own mistress;
I am my master,
His will and dominance
Seething through my being and my existence:
A killer and a benefactor.

I am afraid for my life:
My vessel of existence,
Is a vessel of my negation?

 

Matriarchy

Tough old women sat around a table
Talked about relationships,
Talked about their marriages.
They’ve stood out the ravaging tides of men,
They’ve stood out holding onto their sense.
Hold the fort don’t let it fall to his hands,
She cackles knowingly.
Men are always so hungry
For that grip and rein
Controlling with invisible chains.
Women hold fast to your sanity
Play carefully to decide your destiny.
Your strength lies in breaking theirs,
Don’t be quiet spectators and only glare,
Men have their ways and so must you,
He plays a piece, so you too,
He moves backward, you step through.
Take the win,
Before it becomes a sin,
Against your womanhood, your strength, your integrity,
Ruining your self and your dignity.
Women hold fast,
It is not bombast,
Nor wrong, but strong,
Hold fast hold fast!

 

Featured image by Käthe Kollwitz

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Longnam W. Kharpuri Written by:

Longnam W. Kharpuri was born and brought up in Shillong, Meghalaya. She has recently just finished her MPhil from Delhi University. Her dissertation was titled "Construing a Modern Notion of Khasi Identity". She is interested in the workings of culture and identity. She is an amateur singer and musician, and also sketches sporadically. Her aspirations are to further her studies within the ambit of Cultural Studies.

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